


One Hell of a Dandy Universe Reset, Baby

by JayTDawgzone9999



Category: Space ☆ Dandy, ジョジョの奇妙な冒険 | JoJo no Kimyou na Bouken | JoJo's Bizarre Adventure
Genre: Crack, Gen, In space nobody is available to provide spaceship insurance, Mikitaka discovers the joys of music, Moderate Violence, Multiple Universes, Multiple Universes Collide, No Romance, No Sex, No Smut, Nobody else is impressed, Warping gone wrong, technical problems, technology problems
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-12
Updated: 2019-05-12
Packaged: 2020-03-01 08:34:23
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,002
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18796771
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/JayTDawgzone9999/pseuds/JayTDawgzone9999
Summary: Space Dandy makes a critical navigation error one day that teaches him something very special about the universe.





	One Hell of a Dandy Universe Reset, Baby

**Author's Note:**

> Space Dandy crashes the Aloha-Oe right into Morioh because he shares his only brain cell with Meow and QT.

Somewhere, in some part of the universe, the sun had risen a few hours ago on some nice, pleasant planet, the birds were chirping and a gentle breeze was blowing-not that Space Dandy and his friends either knew or cared, but it was happening all the same.  
Somewhere in that same part of the universe, a man in a three-piece business suit and a skull-patterned tie was walking into the office building he worked in. 

"Ah, what a nice, quiet day it's starting out to be. If only my entire life could be this quiet." he said, making sure the severed hand hidden inside a carefully sealed bag inside his work bag was hidden so nobody else would realize it was in there. 

Again, Dandy and company neither knew or cared about any of this, ignorant about the potential consequences of their latest attempt to escape from Dr. Gel's clutches yet again, Dandy slamming the warp drive button for the 15,764th time that week, feeling far too confident until he heard an ominous crunch sound. 

"Oh sh-oh no, the warp drive's broken! You broke it, Dandy! We're gonna get blown up right meow!" Meow yelled when the ship started vibrating as Dr. Gel's laser beams rushed towards the Aloha Oe. 

"Shit, motherfucker, warp us outta here, damn you! I'm not sacrificing my hair just so you can refuse to do your job you little shit!" Dandy yelled at the warp drive button in anguish. 

"EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!" QT yelled when a laser beam missed the Aloha Oe by a fraction of an inch, blowing up a satellite planet nearby. 

"Dandy, we gotta get outta here right meow!" Meow chimed in with increasing desperation in his voice. 

Dandy sighed, turning to look at his crew mates with a bit of casual annoyance.

"Aw, come on, guys, you know your fearless leader won't let you die that easily." Dandy told them, turning back to look out the front window again. "Come on, baby, let's try this one more time!" Dandy yelled while he smashed the warp drive button again with as much force as he could manage. "Let's blow this joint, baby!!!!!!" 

The warp drive button, having just been damaged beyond all repair, starting beeping as Dandy and his not so fearless crew warped away from Dr. Gel and into-

****************************************************************************************************************************

"Oh, gross, gross! What the hell?" Okuyasu yelled when he found something in the trash after he threw out an empty burger wrapper. 

"Oi, what is it? What'd you find in there?" Josuke asked Okuyasu, Koichi following close behind as Josuke walked over to Okuyasu. 

"Aaagh!" Koichi screamed when Okuyasu took out the severed hand inside a sandwich bag inside the trash when Josuke asked Okuyasu to show him what was so gross when he got there, although neither Josuke nor Okuyasu noticed when he just saw. 

"Aaaugh!" Koichi screamed again, Josuke and Okuyasu too preoccupied staring at the severed hand in the garbage to notice the spaceship hurtling right towards them.

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!" 

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!" 

"Hey, guys, I was just walking by and since I saw you, I thought I would stop by and say hello." Mikitaka, who was just passing by, said right before he noticed he smelled something burning. "Guys? Hello?" 

The silver-haired alien turned in the direction the smell was coming from to see what was causing it when he saw Space Dandy holding a ray-gun at his side and Meow and QT staring at him and Josuke, Okuyasu, and Koichi staring at...well, it was kind of hard to tell for a moment, everyone looking around like they either accidentally stared into the solar eclipse without sunglasses or like they just saw something normal sentient beings were never meant to see. 

"Koichi?" 

"Okuyasu?" 

"Josuke?!"

"Dandy?"

"Dandy!!!!" 

"Meow?" 

"Mikitaka?" 

"Ow!!!!" 

"AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!" Dandy yelled in frustration, accidentally dropping his ray gun. "What the hell is going on? Everyone shut up a second, I got something to say-" 

Unfortunately for Dandy and surprisingly less unfortunately for Mikitaka, some idiots had just started driving by in an open-top convertible blasting loud trap music. 

"-hey, listen to me, guys, I'm trying to-who the hell's playing that awful trash music?" Dandy asked, having not seen the car passing by. 

"Actually, I think I rather enjoy this delightful melody." Mikitaka chimed in. 

"Eh?" Josuke and Okuyasu both asked, glancing at each other in confusion. 

Man, aliens really were something else, they decided. But at least they gave them free ice cream. 

No matter how trash Mikitaka's taste in music was, they decided, how could they judge a guy who gave them free ice cream?

They looked at each other.  
They absolutely couldn't, of course. It would just be wrong, they decided, ignoring Mikitaka dancing to the music and Dandy, Meow, and QT staring at him in total and utter confusion. 

"Ugh, I hate annoying teenagers." Kira, who was heading home, complained. He had gotten out of work early, but at what cost, he mused to himself. "Teenagers and their shitty music really ticks me off. I can't have a quiet life like this." Kira went on thinking, too pissed off to realize that Dandy saw him and pointed his ray gun at him, mistaking him for a rare alien he had been hunting for a while.  
When Kira finally noticed, well, he wasn't about to let this chump ruin his quiet life. 

"Killer Queen!" 

"You're not gonna escape me, alien bastard!" 

As coincidence had it, Kira and Dandy attacked each other at the exact same time, the energy from Dandy's ray gun and Bites the Dust colliding at the exact same time. 

Terrified, tortured screams filled the multiverse for several minutes afterwards, the sound spreading to all the multiverse's many corners, not a soul able to comprehend what just happened. 

Some legends say that if one listens closely, they can still hear loud ass trap music and that somewhere just outside the farthest isolated corners of the multiverse, a tall, silver-haired alien is still dancing to loud-ass trap music.

**Author's Note:**

> This song is the song the idiots in the car were playing and Mikitaka was dancing like the guys in the video: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HoK7uZD-xp4


End file.
